Monday, November 15, 2010

.....too busy to make a life?

Have you ever heard the saying "Don't get so busy making a living, that you forget to make a life"? I've always like that saying. Often times throughout my daily life I find myself thinking or telling my children I'm too busy with what I'm doing to help them with their current request. Telling them we will get to it later, more times than not it never happens. There have also been numerous times when I've thought about making someone a meal after a baby, or a surgery or illness and I've never followed through. Usually using that same I'm just too busy excuse. It doesn't help that I have earned the title of the Worlds Best Procrastinator! By the time I really think about making the meal, I come to the conclusion that now it's too late.

When I read that quote I think am I really that busy? Am I too busy to take the time to play a game with the kids and leave that basket of laundry that needs to get folded? What if Jesus had been to busy to be interrupted? The devotional I read this morning pointed out a time in Matthew 9 in which he was teaching and was interrupted twice, with a request to raise someone's daughter from the dead and by a women who simply touched His cloak and was healed. He rose immediately and responded to the request. He did not tell them he was too busy, he did not wait for a "better time" he simply "got up and went with him" Matthew 9:18.

Puts in perspective how important my load of laundry is! If I truly want to "be more like Jesus" I wouldn't question the business of my own life I would just make a meal and do whatever I could to help out a friend in need. I would get down on the floor and play with my babies while they are still babies! I would get out that annoying playdough mess because it makes them happy and not because I'm worried about the mess!

"Cleaning and scrubbing can wait for tomorrow,
For babies grow up, I've learned, to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep."

So am I really to busy making a living, that I can't make a life?

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

A Time for Everything

I can remember when I found out for the first time that I was expecting. I was SO excited. Not only could I not wait to be a mom, but I had huge expectations of the kind of mom I would be. Now, 3 children later I find I'm setting myself up with similar high expectations. I find myself stuck in a never ending cycle; start my day off with unlikely goals, realize that there is no way I can accomplish all of them, wonder why and feel depressed. To make matters worse I compare my life to others; relatives, friends, and even mom's on TV! I wonder if other moms can do it, why can't I?

But here's the thing, I realized that I've begun to focus too much on what I'm not, and that while I'm wasting time beating myself up I'm missing out on opportunities with my children. They're the reason I'm a mom! God put them in my care, and he did that for a reason. I may not feel like the best mom in the world, but to them I am! Right now they are all that matters, not keeping the house perfect, not keeping up on their non-exsistant scrapbooks, not caring about the spilled milk on the floor, and not trying to be super mom!

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 talks about a time for everything. Like my Mom's Devoitional Bible states: "A time to focus on our children and a time to give attention to ourselves and our dreams" I'm reminded that I can't do the impossible, right now I may not be able to do everything. I have to accept that and remember that most importantly I need to just be MOM.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Goodness In Goodness Out

Thanks to a great friend, I'm on this being a better mommy kick right now. Well and not just mommy, but all the aspects of my life. We've found some great books, I'm having a hard time sticking with just one! I love when you read something and you feel so inspired by it. Almost like "Yes, that makes so much sense!" I'm struggling lately, with not getting stressed out over every little thing. I find myself irritated and angry and feeling guilty about it later. So after reading the latest chapter in the book: "Out of the Spin Cycle" by Jen Hatmaker I again felt inspired. She talks about there being a simple explanation for our mommy outbursts. For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good thing out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. Matt 12:34-35

She writes; Our only hope to speak with kindness, to lead with patience, and to not threaten our children with homicide is to ensure our spiritual reserves are not bone-dry. Moms are the middle of the flow chart; the arrows of exertion flow constantly out from us, but when no arrows of strength, grace, and peace are flowing in, the whole mechanism is in danger. Goodness in equals goodness out. No goodness in equals, no goodness out.

When God's Word is flowing through my life my baby can spill his fourth drink of the day and I can say "It's just a drink." When I'm spiritually dry, I could literally lie on the soggy floor and bawl over it."

I could go on and on and write the whole chapter, but I won't. Needless to say I had a "Yes" moment reading that. I don't know how many times I've gotten upset over spilled milk or hid in the bathroom for a moment to get away from the chaos going on around me. Why do we allow ourselves to feel so burned out. I can remember taking pride in my job, before I quit, and being proud of myself. I think sometimes because it can be somewhat of a thankless job, it's difficult to be prideful of our jobs as mom's. Especially when there are days when it seems like the walls are crumbling around us. But darn it, we need to do it anyway! Take pride in what we do! Look at the beautiful little people around you and realize how great they are. And we did that! Don't let the chaos make you who you are. Look at a mess for what it is, just a mess.

Find a "simple space at the beginning of your day before anyone needs to be attended to in any way, a moment just for you and God and his beautiful Word-this is essential. This is where goodness is stored up for the day, and you'll need it; it's perishable. This is when Jesus reminds you, "you can do this. I'm right here. It's how you become centered and remember that spilled drinks and tantrums are a blip on the timeline of your life. It's when God can whisper, I have all you need. Goodness in, Goodness out.

Friday, November 5, 2010

My Little Blogger

Things Above

It's been a while since I've blogged. I've been struggling lately with my own confidence. In my abilities as a mother, a wife, a friend and the list goes on. Reflecting on my life I think about how often I feel like I have to please other people. I do things in hopes of making other people happy in the end hoping that they will accept me. I did it all through high school and even though I like to believe that changed when I became an independent adult I'm not so sure I can claim that. I still have the desire to feel well liked by everyone. I can't stand when I feel like someone may have a bad opinion about me, or looks at me for the person I was back when they knew me as opposed to the person I am now.

When I think about it or even say it out loud, I think how stupid. Why should any of that matter? In Colossians 3:2 it says to "Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." I look at this verse and often think about the "things" I waste time worrying about. The opinions of others shouldn't matter to me when I compare them to the "things above." In the end those opinions that I lose sleep over, truly won't matter. There is only ONE, that will.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Good Friends

From the book "Out of the Spin Cycle" by Jen Hatmaker

"Friends help you uphold the heavy responsibility of motherhood and remind you you're not crazy. They don't complain when your kids interrupt your phone conversation every 12 seconds. They gladly enter the parenting discussions that our husbands lose patience with after only the fourth time. Friends don't even bat an eye when you burst out crying for no good reason.......

If we are to love each other like Jesus loved us, then it makes practical sense to band together during young motherhood. Because- like Jesus does-we'll end up loving each other when we're crazy, burned out, hysterical, and exhausted. We'll stand by one another during the most neurotic phase of parenting there is. We won't let a member of our tribe slip under the radar or get swallowed by isolation. We share the the burden of parenting, making it lighter for everyone to carry. We'll remind our friends to laugh and call forward the best in each other.
Motherhood is the task that brings us together, but love is the glue that binds us together. If we're too busy to love each other like this, then we're too busy. We need our friends. We need their counsel and companionship; they need our compassion and comic relief. "You must love one another," said Jesus.
We really must."

Just saying....

Tuesday, August 10, 2010


Tuesday Morning

I've been reading a book and it talks about mom's just being real with each other. So this is me being real. I'm a little afraid, because for some reason I feel the need to act like I have it all together. In actuality I'm far from it. I'm gonna make this short, because while I do this I'm ignoring my two oldest, nicely the little guy is sleeping. :)

Me being real on a Tuesday morning.....
I hate waking up. Partly because usually I stay up too late, and partly because I'm not looking forward to the housework ahead of me. But this morning didn't start off too bad. I made it up to shower and was nicely surprised to hear that my neighbor was probably not going to bring over their kids(I watch their two kids m-th). It didn't take long for something to go wrong however. Note to self: Do not take little guys diaper off without immediately replacing it with a fresh one. Um duh! In my attempts to clean up his mess from breakfast and try to give dog her medication my little one had left me a small gift on the carpet. I thought for a moment that we had acquired a rabbit in the house! I managed to stay calm and clean up the mess.
An hour later, I heard form my 4 year old little man, "mom I had an accident" shortly after he had ran up from the toy room telling me he had to go potty! Yep sure enough pee on the rug directly in front of the toilet. I admit I got a little mad, but when Eli asked me why I was mad at him, I told myself to calm down. " I'm not mad at you buddy, I'm mad at the situation." But he's now had another bath, and my floor is probably cleaner than what it was before. So it's not all bad. It's only 9:30 however so we'll see where the day goes from here! :)